Growing up, I was generally a loser. I grew up watching Michael Jordan, but I was a terrible basketball player. In high school, I finally found my people—drama (and chorus, yes I was a choir boy) kids—but I never got any of the parts I tried out for. I would have girls I would be interested in, and got rejected when I asked for dates. Junior year, I finally got a girl to date me. She cheated on me. Loser.
We often hate to see ourselves in this light. We want to be the heroes of our stories, the kind of people who lift ourselves up by our bootstraps, climb Mount Everest, and get the girl! Truthfully, this is not how life plays out most of the time. In fact, I would argue I’ve spent more time losing than winning in the grand scheme of life.
Fast forward to my third year (of six, yes, six years to get a bachelor’s degree, because I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life at 18) of college, and I had been fired from a coffee shop job for being “too slow”. I failed a welding class. I was going to fail a web design class, until I dropped out of it. I got rejected by the university I wanted to get into. I graduated college, and the job I had lined up after graduation fell through. I am close friends with losing.
I don’t say this to make you feel bad for me. There is plenty in my life that I have succeeded at, feel accomplished about, and I am happy. I do know the importance of remembering my failures, however, because they teach us more about ourselves than we could ever learn from success. Losing can be an opportunity to learn something, and to overcome obstacles. Losing can be an opportunity to teach us to win again.
Sometimes, we play it safe, however, because losing is scary. We can look unsuccessful. We can make fools out of ourselves. We can get rejected. We can “lose everything”.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but one day, we are going to lose everything. One day, you and I will die. Probably 50 years after my death, most people won’t remember me. But because we’re so afraid of being a “loser”, we play it safe. We don’t pursue things we’re good at. We don’t ask that person on a date. We don’t try something we’ve never done, because we want to be amazing at it the first time—instead of mediocre.
Penn N Paper started with an idea. What if I could spark wonder in people? What if I just did some photography / videography / design work, stand-up comedy, and kept doing the podcast and the blog? For so long, I stopped doing things out of fear. What if the things I do aren’t good enough? What if I look like a failure? What if the things that I do aren’t successful? Finally, I’ve come to a conclusion. Who cares?
Since we’re going to lose everything, what are we so afraid of? Here we are, matches burning in the night, only to be snuffed out in a mere 60-90 years. Who are we trying to impress? Who are we trying to look good for? Why should we care?
Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that we should just live for now, to waste all of your money, and to live for whatever comes your way. What I am saying, is to live for more than impressing others. Follow something that you’re passionate about. Something that keeps you up at night. Work at it. Get good at it. Don’t be afraid fail. Don’t be afraid to be unsuccessful. Don’t be afraid to be a loser. We’re going to lose it all eventually anyway.
I have things I am passionate about and am gifted with, and I am going to pursue them. I am so tired of being fearful of looking like a “loser”. At Penn N Paper, we want encourage you and also have this mentality.
A very wise man once said this:
“You who are young, make the most of your youth. Relish your youthful vigor. Follow the impulses of your heart. If something looks good to you, pursue it. But know also that not just anything goes; You have to answer to God for every last bit of it.”
It doesn’t matter your age, we’re all young enough. Get out there, and be a loser.
Let’s lose together. Let us know what you’re doing by commenting or sharing this blog and telling us what you’re doing!